The Four Walls of Fear

Icy cold fear flowed through me the other day. I read a couple of text messages from people I  love and in an instant the beauty surrounding me suddenly went gray. Silent. Dark. My heart flooded with the familiar feelings of fear,  fast forwarding to unwanted possibilities. I tried like crazy to grasp onto the comfort of scriptures I've memorized and tucked into my heart over the years - but my mind seemed to go blank.  I tried talking to God but the only words I seemed to utter were ~ "O, please God, No!"  (In hindsight I realize those words were a deep, heartfelt prayer. Just the kind God's longs to hear.) 

As I fast-forwarded into my fear... I also began to feel incredibly discouraged. Disappointed with myself for climbing down the ladder into my self-created pit. What was the matter with me? Haven't I learned anything over the years? Didn't I know how to "turn my worries into prayers?"  Why, O why, was I spinning my worry wheel while at the same time it seemed I was unable to pray?    

Maybe you've wondered,  like I have, if you're the only one who struggles with fear and worry.  It's not something we talk about openly, especially as Christians.  After all, aren't we suppose to be: "Anchored on the Rock" - "Giving Thanks in ALL things"?  And sometimes it seems that the moment we express our fears,  some dear soul feels it is their duty to give us a faith-pep-talk, rather than just listening to our hearts, letting us simply know they care. 

God must have known that fear would be a constant struggle for each of us.  Recently I learned there are 365 "Fear not's" in the Bible... one for every day of the year. On this day I needed one of those "Fear not's."

I picked up my devotional book and encountered one such story that was shared in John 20:19-20.  The story of Jesus' strong, fishermen friends experiencing yet another not so strong faith-moment.  These trembling guys helped me realize I was not alone.  John writes: 
 
 "... Later on that day, the disciples had gathered together, but, FEARFUL of the Jews, had locked all the doors in the house. (Considering the circumstances I'm pretty certain that I would have not only locked myself inside the house, I would have stacked the heaviest furniture I could find in front of the doors - and secured all the shutters.)   Jesus entered,  (Isn't that just like Jesus!  Even though the door was locked and the do not disturb sign was hanging on the door knob, Jesus knew that one knock on the bolted door would only intensify their fear, spinning them into utter panic!) ...Jesus stood among them, and Jesus said, “Peace to you." ...  Jesus repeated his greeting: “Peace to you...” (emphasis mine)

As I looked closer at these verses I noticed a few things: 

• Jesus didn't pound at their door of fear insisting they let Him in.
• Jesus didn't demand they open the door of their trembling hearts. 
• He didn't drag them from the "protection" of their four walls.
• Jesus didn't scold, berate or make fun of them for being fearful.
• He didn't say: "Boys, Boys, Boys!  Haven't you learned anything?" 
• In fact, unlike other "door" scriptures ...  this time Jesus didn't knock at all. 

               He knew His friends.
                      He knew their whys.
                           He knew their fears.
                               HE KNEW THEIR NEED.    
   
HE CAME TO THEM...
HE ENTERED INTO THEIR  FOUR WALLS OF FEAR...  
He KNEW HIS FRIENDS SIMPLY NEEDED HIS PRESENCE. 

And He said ~ PEACE TO YOU.  Not once ~ but twice!   

Jesus brought them peace.  He gave them courage. 
  
I came to realize that if He would do that for His friends 2000 years ago He could do it for me, too ... and He did.  He entered into my four walls of fear and in a way that only Jesus can, He gave me the presence (and the present) of His peace.  

Do you need to hear a "Fear not" today?  Listen carefully...  to you He is  saying:  

“Peace...  PEACE to you...” (emphasis mine)